HELLO!


Hey all, welcome to my blog.  

If you’re here because you’re tired of Supernatural and the cast- I have a lot of posts that will be of interest to you. Way too many. I kind of wish they’d retire the show and their stupidity. If you’re wondering why I’m trash talking your favourite show – there’s an explanation post here.

Please read the rest of this post if you’re wondering where the Supernatural recaps have gone.

If you have a general comment about Supernatural, the cast or whatever, I now have an open thread!

(more…)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine (Season 6)


Well. I figured I’d post something, but it’s not even snark. Sigh. What have I become?


B99/Season 6

Brooklyn Nine-Nine is one of those shows that works better when I watch it all in one go, but I’ve often found that the best way to determine how well a show works is to watch it week by week. Or maybe anticipation is what makes it good or bad? I don’t know, y’all.

Anyway, I watched the entire show during the time season 6 was airing. While I’d seen all of the seasons except half of season 4 and 5 before, it took watching the Backstreet Boys cold open for me to get back into it. That being said it reminds me of my all time favourite show, Happy Endings. I think during the early seasons it had the some of the same writers.

(more…)

Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping


2016 | Synopsis

Childhood friends Conner (Andy Samberg), Owen (Jorma Taccone) and Lawrence (Akiva Schaffer) found fame and fortune after forming the hip-hop group the Style Boyz. Owen and Lawrence faded into the background when frontman Conner left the band to launch a successful solo career. Now, the egotistical singer decides to film a documentary about his life while he’s still on top. When his second album flops, the camera is there to capture his world come crashing down.

First of all….I’M A STYLE BOY 4 LIIIFE. 

Secondly, I was on the train listening to the soundtrack when hit me that Conner4Real = Conner Friel (which is the main character’s full name). I love wordplay.

Thirdly, I feel like The Lonely Island should be the ones to produce my Untitled Unrealistic Teen Drama. Guys, get on that. Skylet deserves to have her story told! This is also a shameless plug of my scripts because remember when I wrote scripts?! I reread them all and they were HILARIOUS. Especially because I remember exactly what inspired me to write them (hi, 90210!). I never did resolve the cliffhanger. Oh well. 

One day. 

Anyway, back to the movie. I actually liked this more than I thought I would? It was strangely watchable. I actually watched it three days in a row. 

It usually takes me three days to finish ONE movie. 

According to the five hundred interviews I watched, TLI were inspired by all of those pop documentaries that were all of the range five years ago. They watched Bieber’s, Katy Perry’s etc and took elements of each and created Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping. Oh and they parody a Macklemore song. 

I’m not going to recap the movie because it’s been done, but it ended up being a box office bomb. I can think of several reasons why. The first one being the terrible title. I mean, I get the title, but if I’m going to pay for a movie it needs to have a basic title. Like, Harry Potter is basically just Harry Potter. Nobody walked up to the kiosk and asked for Harry Potter and whatever else the long ass titles are. 

They should have just called it Popstar. It’s simple and to the point. 

The second reason is that the trailer didn’t really do it it justice. I actually saw the trailer back in 2016 (or whenever it was uploaded) because I’m subscribed to The Lonely Island’s YouTube channel and I thought it looked terrible. Too many celebrity cameos and too much Bieber impersonation. Up until my Brooklyn Nine-Nine rewatch, the movie never crossed my mind again. 

The third reason is that by the time it came out, The Lonely Island were kind of not all that relevant? Certainly not enough for a movie to make bank. I remember reading an article about the movie before it had a title and thinking that it was a few years too late. 

It turns out that their first movie Hot Rod met a similar fate (box office bomb) and I went and watched that and it was absolutely ridiculous and HILARIOUS, but would I go out and see it, probably not.

I think they’re more small screen entertainment than anything because you can rewatch it over and get the jokes you missed the first time.

Anyway, one major plus side is that they did all of the songs for the movie themselves and some are pretty good. I still listen to a few of them occasionally. 

I totally recommend the movie if crazy, ridiculous humour is your thing. 

Rating: 9/10

I was going to give it 10/10, but there was no Chris Hemsworth cameo and I get that he’s not a musician, but still. My aesthetic needs need to be met (see I can use words twice too!).

the unauthorised bash brothers experience


What’s up, snarklings?! It’s been a while…but I’m back with another mini-review of…

I read a review about this that called it ‘amazing television’ and that was a damn lie. 

It’s okay television. Or a visual poem as they’re calling it. Apparently, it’s a spoof of Beyonce’s Lemonade, which is something that I haven’t and probably will not see. 

It’s based on the ‘Bash Brothers’ two baseball players that were known for bashing their forearms together when they hit a home run. Oh, and apparently they both did a bunch of steroids. One revealed it publicly and they’ve been enemies ever since. 

I suppose you’ll either like this or you don’t. I was amused during some parts, but more in a WHY?! kind of way than a ha ha ha ha haaaa way. There are a bunch of 10/10 reviews on IMDB (which, of course, is known for its objectivity) and everyone loves it. 

When I finished watching it, my reaction was literally: okay

That was after I found myself jamming to “Let’s Bash’ which is the only song I liked from the album (it’s an album too!).

I like the first song too – “José and Mark” – but I’m not American and the baseball theme probably sailed directly over my head.

Oakland Nights is decent and it features Sterling K. Brown as Sia. For whatever reason, I didn’t find that particularly amusing. Maybe if it had been Sterling K. Brown as Gordon Walker (he’ll always be GW to me!) as Sia, it would have landed better for me, but meh. Humour is subjective. 

I think The Lonely Island are definitely better in small doses, but overall it was a fun watch. 

I’d give it a cool 6 outta 10.

7 Days In Hell 


7 Days In Hell | 2015 | HBO

Tennis champions Aaron Williams (Andy Samberg) and Charles Poole (Kit Harington) have an epic tennis match that lasts for seven days.

So, I’m a fan of Andy Samberg. I’m a fan of over the top comedy. I’m a fan of mockumentaries. I’m a fan of tennis. I am just not a fan of this movie. Apparently, they shot it in three days and — well, I don’t think it would make a difference. 

Technically, this movie has a great Rotten Tomatoes score, but it was very weird to me and basically not funny. It started off okay. I thought the reverse Blindside scenario – Aaron Williams being the adopted brother of Serena and Venus – was hilarious. 

The part where Aaron kills a man and doesn’t forfeit his match? Hilarious. He then quits tennis and the movie just sort of loses its steam for me there. 

It was like what happens to my stories when I get bored and just have a character do something they wouldn’t do and double down on that. Like a devout nun deciding to join Floyd Mayweather’s Money team. 
Those stories say hidden from society. They lie buried on a hard drive that I never use. This movie went on and on, like an overextended SNL sketch. Perhaps that was the problem. The joke wore thin by the end of the movie. By the time they *SPOILER ALERT* kill each other, I wasn’t even invested anymore. 

It’s also kind of off putting just how much some of these comedies make light of sexual harassment. I’m not even the most Me Too-ish person, but a lot of things are just not aging well. Some of these jokes aren’t really funny. 

Oh and a weird chunk of the movie is in a CGI Swedish male prison (insert obvious joke here – the movie certainly did!) and yeah. I like weird shit, but this was just wacky and tacky at the same time. 

Watch it if you dare!

Avengers: Endgame


People are annoying in general, but whenever things like Endgame come around, they seem to turn it up a notch.
I’m not the biggest MCU fan. I prefer the first two Thor movies over Ragnarok. I haven’t seen Infinity War (or half of the MCU movies). I have no plans to see Endgame in the near future and quite frankly, I am not interested in when anyone else plans to see it. I don’t get the hype. I feel like it’s a combination of FOMO and trend following because the way people go crazy over these films genuinely baffles me. 

I went on Wikipedia and read the summary and it was just as I predicted (and again, haven’t seen Infinity War, it was just not that hard to guess what would happen). Yet everyone is going into meltdowns over completely avoidable spoilers. First of all, it’s a Marvel movie. They generally end the same way. Someone dies. Someone lives. Post credit scene. Yay!

Secondly, if being spoiled means that much to you, why are you on the internet? Why are you on YouTube comments sections about the movie. I saw someone who watched a non-spoiler video on the movie and got spoiled. Why are you watching a non-spoiler video and NOT THE MOVIE? Why are you banking on strangers to not spoil a movie for you? They don’t care about you. Love yourself! Get a grip or get off the internet. 

I saw that one girl’s boyfriend dumped her for spoiling the movie. Well. Awkward. IRL spoiling is probably a shitty thing to do, but people are going to be talking about the movie. The best way to avoid it is to accept that this is all fiction and it has no bearing on your life whatsoever. 

Like, damn, y’all, it’s not that deep. I know that it’s been a long eleven year journey and emotions are running high. Along with the bank balance of Disney. It’s basically been an eleven year payment plan. Let’s be real. Marvel basically made the same movie 52 times and people are acting like it’s revolutionary. Nah, they just churn them out faster than they used to. 

All of that being said, I am grateful to Marvel for allowing Chris Hemsworth to bless my screen. I’ll be honest beyond Thor and The Avengers his movies aren’t great but whatever. Now we have to see him and Tessa Thompson in a Men In Black sequel that absolutely nobody asked for, but I can’t complain. Every role he gets is a blessing for my eyes.

xoxo,

your resident party pooper

the end is near


Supernatural, the show my blog is unlovingly named after, is finally ending after the upcoming fifteenth season. Which means that it’s not over yet and by making this announcement we still have to live with the knowledge that there’s more to come. 

Big woo. 

Considering that I read an interview two months ago where Jensen said that they were happy for the show to go on for as long as possible – they’re asses got cancelled.

I’m personally not affected by this news in any way. The sweet joy I thought I’d feel has come out as a meh. I cancelled the show for myself five seasons ago. Yet, I find myself oddly sympathetic towards people who will genuinely miss the show. For many of them, it’s been years of behaving foolishly and spending money of a bunch of actors who spend said money even more frivolously. 

I wish them luck with their return back to the real world. 

In the case of Misha, I don’t care what he does, but I’m sure he’ll pop up on Legacies or something. I’m waiting for Jared’s Bravo reality show and maybe Jensen can like, record audio books of the dictionary or something. Just some suggestions for them. 

I will be back to celebrate properly when the show ACTUALLY ends. It’s not over until it’s over. 

5 Awesome Gift Ideas!


Happy New Year (give or take three months), snarklings! I think is is my first (or second) post of the year. 
We all want to toss out the old (baggage, friends, body fat) and introduce the new (friends, baggage to be thrown away next year, body fat that will be gained over the year) and these wacky products from my favourite website of ALL TIME. 

1. Handheld Body Smell Checker
Odor intensity measuring device

Actually this is a pretty good one. Well. Maybe not as a gift. Unless it’s for someone that you hate but somehow need to buy a gift for them? Stranger things have happened.

Never be caught out again by unpleasant odors with the Tanita Handheld Body Smell Checker, a convenient way to keep a close tab on your personal hygiene. Simply extend the sensor arm and hold the device close to your body in an area of choice and get a reading that measures your odor on a 11-stage scale. The process only takes around ten seconds, during which time Tanita’s ES-100 device analyzes for smell-producing particulate matter. Since it is reading the intensity of smells, you can check not only for bad odors but also perfume or aftershave that is too strong

2. Shell Drink Bottle Case
Seashell design

We might need to take this one for a spin in the Delorean so that Castaway era Tom Hanks can quench his thirst in style. 

Carry your drink around with a touch of primitive island lifestyle chic! The visually unique and surprisingly practical Giant Triton Shell Drink Bottle Case is inspired by the titular marine mollusc famous for its massive shell. The cute case has an aluminum coating that insulates the inside, while the softly textured exterior also features a red cord and carabiner that allows you to attach the shell to your belt or bag like a conch for blowing.

3. Talking Animal Ears Tissue Dispenser

…why cry with a regular tissue box dispenser when you can cry in STYLE?

Make reaching for a Kleenex a wholly different kind of experience with this Talking Animal Ears Tissue Dispenser. Takara Tomy Arts has designed this unique item for the popular household brand of Nepia Hana Celeb moisturizing facial tissues (available as an optional extra), which famously feature cute animal faces on the boxes. When you take a tissue, your newly transformed “animal tissue box” will talk to you in Japanese. There are two versions: a rabbit or least weasel, each with different voices and dialogue. The rabbit will comfort you with soothing phrases, while the weasel is more energetic and perks you up.

4. Tissue Box Japanese Police Car
Remote control patrol vehicle toy

AGAIN WITH THE TISSUES?? Am I the only one who just uses the box that they come in? Do I need to manage my time better so that I can take my tissue dispenser game the next level? I need answers? Where’s is Jaaaaa?

There’s an emergency! Call the cops! And they will come whizzing over with Kleenex to rescue the situation. That is, if you have the RC Tissue Box Japanese Police Car. Yet another unique remote control vehicle by Kyosho, the design of the box exterior resembles Japanese police patrol cars. Just take up the controller and start driving your tissue box cop car around the house. Car chases will never be the same again!

5. Sushi Roll Towel Gift Set

Does anyone love sushi THIS much? Just get me a regular towel and go.

The three towels in the Norimaki Sushi Roll Towel Gift Set come in a dry bamboo leaf-style wrapping traditionally used for serving sushi. At first glance, the three “sushi towels” look like norimaki (sushi roll with seaweed), complete with the colorful filling for natto-maki, kappa-maki and tekka-maki rolls. But despite the “bento” lunchbox packaging, these are actually three small towels that would make a great present for someone with a culinary bent.

I’m too lazy to link them, but these items can all be purchased from Japan Trend Shop.

stupid and senseless: jussie smollett


So, three weeks ago on January 29th, Jussie Smollett called the police to report that he’d been attacked. According to what was first reported, it was a racially motivated attack as well as political and homophobic. Fair enough, that’s not unheard of. 

On that same night, I saw many people questioning the story, but given that it was developing and that I have no real affinity for Jussie, I felt bad for him and I kept it moving. I stopped watching Empire a long time ago (heck, I just remembered that I used to post recaps for it!) and haven’t even so much as seen a picture of him since. So, I was like, ‘well, that’s a shame’ and went about my business.

Next thing I know, it’s being reported that he went ahead with a concert two days later (a bit iffy, but fine, I can buy that he was standing up to the haters). It’s what he said during this concert that took me from sympathetic indifference to is this dude okay? 

I’m the gay Tupac

1. Tupac was shot dead

2. Tupac did talk a lot about real issues and things that people didn’t necessarily focus on, but…

3. He’s dead. 

What do you mean that you’re the gay Tupac? Why bring Tupac into this? Jussie, are you okay?

That nonsense was followed by ‘I fought the fuck back’ which I couldn’t even make sense of. You’re the Gay Tupac and you fought back. Was he trying to start hashtags? #gaytupac #iftfback

Even after that weird statement, I didn’t really dive deeper until his GMA interview, which I didn’t even watch until a few days ago. Just the quotes were enough to make it seem off. Watching it after the developments was even more disturbing. 

Anyway, onto the interview…some quotes (taken from Daily Fail).

‘You do such a disservice when you lie about stuff like this.’

‘He says, “This MAGA country n****!” and punches me right in the face. So I punch his a** back. We end up tussling by the stairs, fighting, fighting, fighting…and then it just stopped.’

‘I looked down and I noticed a rope around my neck and I started screaming, “There’s a f****** rope around my neck!”

‘It feels like if I had said it was a Muslim or a Mexican or someone black, I feel like the doubters would have supported me a lot more. That says a lot about the place that we are at in the country right now.’

‘I want a little gay boy who might watch this to see that I fought the f*** back. They ran off,’ I didn’t.’

‘I still want to believe there’s something called justice.’

‘I’ve heard that it was a date gone bad which I so resent that narrative. I’m not going to go out to get a tuna sandwich and a salad to meet somebody. That’s ridiculous and offensive.

‘They called me a f****t. I don’t need to add anything like that. I don’t need to make MAGA hat the cherry on the top of some racist sundae.’

‘I will never be the man that this did not happen to… I am forever changed

The interview was an interesting watch. It wasn’t very convincing. In parts he’s laughing, in parts he was indignant, but not in a way that seemed genuine. It was all over the place. 

My favorite part was where he boldly defended his decision to go to Subway at 2am. Make no mistake, it was reckless and stupid. I say this as someone who does late night runs at the store – not even I would leave my house at that time to get anything, and I’m not famous and currently receiving threats. 

Which, by the way…

I mean…

Anyway, back to the interview and one thing I found strange was his version of what went down. Apparently, the attackers called out ‘EMPIRE!’ and he doesn’t answer to that. 

1. If these racist, homophobic people know enough about you to be near your home, they’d surely know your name? Or your characters name at least?

2. Again, this seems like an odd detail to bring up in an interview. To the police, yes. In an interview…

The next part that raised eyebrows. He mentioned calling his manager in Australia – establishing that someone overheard the attack. So, he took his phone out to make the call right? Unfortunately, in the interview, he says his phone fell out of his pocket while he was fighting back and when he picked it up, his manager was still on his phone. 

Boy. 

See now, what he should have said was that his phone was knocked out of his hand. Which it would have been had he really been seriously jumped. Unless he was using a headset – but I think it’s safe to say he didn’t think of that.

The next part of the interview that didn’t really do it for me was when he was asked about the motive. 

“I come really, really hard against 45. I come really, really hard against his administration, and I don’t hold my tongue.”

1. Shuuuuut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. HOLD YOUR DAMN TONGUE! Who has seen all of this anti-Trump activism of yours until now? Hardly anyone. Trump wasn’t even aware of it. No one was! 

2. Where were his people and why did they allow him to answer this question?

There was also the part about the noose and bleach which was even more bizarre. He didn’t realise there was bleach on him until he got back to his apartment…I…I can’t even follow all of it anymore. 

It’s like a mishmash of an Empire and Supernatural episode. Just a hot mess all around. 

Unfortunately for him, the day after this interview, two Nigerian brothers that he knows personally were arrested in relation to the attack. 

Once again, when he commented on that he said that he felt sympathy for them. Uh… What? 

They were released without charge two days later after singing like damn canaries and the rest, as they say, is history. 

Of course, now we all know that he made calls to them before and after the attack hence why he handed over incomplete call logs to the police when they wanted them. 
During the interview he had this to say:

I‘m sorry, but I’m not going to do that, I have private pictures and videos and numbers. My partner’s number, my family’s numbers, my castmates’ numbers, my friends’ numbers, my private emails, my songs.”

Yeah, but…you called the police. You told them you were on the phone. You told them your manager could corroborate your story because you were on the phone to him! You brought up the phone! 

You pointed out the camera during a walk through. The police merely thought you were trying to do their job for them. You chose to keep a ‘noose’ around your neck to ‘preserve evidence’. 

Yet, your phone was off limits? 

The story gets crazier and crazier but now obviously he’s been arrested for filing a false police report. 

Other details:

  • He also paid the brothers with a personal check for $3500. They say it was to stage the attack
  • He says it was for training and a music video and curiously, he backdated the check to 23rd Jan.
  • There’s footage of the brothers buying supplies they say he instructed them to buy
  • Apparently footage of them rehearsing the attack exists. 
  • Jussie supposedly has a drug problem
  • He claims that he’s innocent
  • He’s been axed from the last two episodes of EMPIRE 

It seems like he’s guilty. 

    ….Yet, somehow, I feel like there is something missing from this story. It doesn’t make any sense. Right now the motive is money, but that doesn’t even make sense to me. Maybe he has a martyr complex. I don’t know. 

    What I do know that it’s sad that he’s thrown his career away over something so fucking stupid. Personal checks? Using your personal cell phone? Watching a basic police procedural show could have kept the scent off him for a while longer. 

    Damn shame. 

    stupid and senseless: kanye west and chance the rapper


    This was written on 29th April, but apparently I didn’t care enough to post it. Given that Kanye is back in the news, I might as well post it now. I see that he went for the whole blaming his mental illness for the latest rant. He has nothing whatsoever to promote I’m assuming. 

    His handler needs to change his Twitter password.  

    Anyway, onto this (OLD) post. Not sure if the tweets are still up, but I guess we’ll all see when I hit post!


    Let me just start with Chance. He waded into the argument to defend his friend, which would be admirable if his friend wasn’t currently crapping all over black people. I don’t know about you but if my friend was saying any of what Kanye was saying, they would receive a strongly worded message and ZERO public support from me.

    Chance deserved to be shouted out by Trump – and his statement apologizing was bullshit too. He knew what he was doing and he did it anyway. Pick a side and stick to it.

    No, black people don’t have to be democrats, but nobody asked him. Nor does he speak for anyone but himself.

    Kanye West is CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCEEEEEEEEELLEEEEEEEEEED. He can go and promote his album in the whitest town in Alabama for all I care. He’s not receiving a single cent from me. He is disgusting, an opportunist and a complete hypocrite who is only interested in himself. Any black person co-signing any of his rantings and ravings needs to check themselves.

    My favourite part was this Kim K tweet which still doesn’t make any sense to me.

    Kanye is years ahead of his time?? GIRL, BYE. Ben Carson called, he wants his privileged black person taking shots at fellow black people by aligning themselves with a racist trophy back.

    ….not even political but you love Trump and have a MAGA hat? Yeah, sure. Got it. I love how him and Kim are all like wah wah wah free thought – in that case, accept the criticism and shut the fuck up. Simple.

    Too bad that they’re both idiots.