snarkview: real housewives of vancouver | season 1, eps 4-5

I didn’t recap four, probably because it was boring, so here’s episode 5.

Jody and Ronnie meet to discuss Mary. Again. Ronnie says Mary should not mistake her kindness for a weakness.

Reiko continues to be boring. Her cars are on point, though. I wonder if she kept them after the divorce? Oh, yeah, none of these women are married to the same anymore. Surprising.

Christina and Mary go to get eyelash extensions…and bitch about Jody. Mary mentions that Jody and Ronnie are friends now. Christina says that all Ronnie and Jody have in common is that they each have three children by three different men. Mary reads out a bunch of terrible text messages that Ronnie sent and Christina is distraught. They both decide to skip Ronnie’s tennis luncheon.

At the tennis luncheon, Reiko’s mom is a kick ass tennis player and infinitely more interesting than her daughter. They realise that Christina isn’t there and they prank call her. And then Christina calls Reiko and tells them she’s not there because of the text messages. Ronnie gets annoyed and tells her to stay out of it.

Reiko is doing…I don’t know, I got hungry and got some snacks.

Mary and Ronnie meet up. They hug and… Order wine? Not only that, Ronnie has already been drinking. Ronnie says she’s not going to stop drinking. And we finally hear that Mary had some choice words of her own. Namely that Ronnie should ‘get a job and start mooching off other men‘. After some incoherent arguing, they say this is the first argument they’ve had in years. Yet, here they are on Reality TV, famed for breaking up any and all forms of relationships.

Reiko….well, she’s at some car thing in these shoes.

Mary and Christina meet up. Mary tells Christina that she met up with Ronnie and made up with her. Uh oh…Christin is not happy.

After a photoshoot for Mary’s scarf line, she invites the girls to the hotel to argue/check out the scarves. Mostly argue. Reiko is trying to make herself interesting by wearing a hat. It’s not working. The arguing starts with Mary asking Jody where her family is from. Jody says that she heard that Mary said she wasn’t Jewish. Mary says she didn’t say this but Ronnie says she did. Ronnie (plus wine) confronts Christina, and then circles back to Mary. Ronnie is slurring badly and when Mary points that out Ronnie tells her to go fuck herself. Mary then throws Ronnie out. Ronnie asks her how many millions she made from her record sales.

Didn’t these two JUST make up?