eight years

Apparently, my blog turned eight on 6th December. That’s a long ass time, but in fairness, I haven’t watched the show for three of those years. I was going to watch season 15. Specifically the last episode, but I’m wavering. I saw a bunch of tweets about Christian Kane being on the show and there’s something about him that irks me. I think I was blinded by the hair before, but yeah…

What do you say, snarklings, do I do one last snarkview?

Continue reading “eight years”

Bad Products, cont. 

It’s that time once again. I recommend the products, you decide which one is the least ridiculous and get yourself something special!

1. For the handyman coffee enthusiasts I present the Power Tool Battery Coffee Maker.

Power Tool Battery Coffee Maker CM501DZ means you’ll never be short of a cup of coffee even on a construction site, as long as you have a drill or other power tool lying around

Continue reading “Bad Products, cont. “

Happy New Year + 2017 roundup. 

Last year I posted… uh, well, not a lot. Or it wasn’t structured or cohesive at any rate.
That’s not going to change.

Supernatural watchers, I’m still on a hiatus/neveragainatus. However, all of the posts will remain up because a lot of them are still quite popular. I guess that’s either a testament to my great wit or the garbage that masquerades as the show these days. If you’d like to discuss the show, there’s an extremely dead open post on the sidebar and you can contact me via email (spnsnark[at]gmail etc).

There will be more movie and TV reviews on the way when I find something that doesn’t put me to sleep. I might even read a book! Or two.

Potentially Bad Moviethon lives on! Send me your recommendations.

The Girl Who Hates Everything does not live on. I love everything now. Seriously.

The Real World: Trump Administration…is on hiatus, much like the administration’s common sense. Same goes for the other political posts. I toyed with making a political blog but then I came to my senses. Life is depressing enough. Two blogs that do a better job than I ever did are Mock Paper Scissors and Trumptimestamp. Brexit no longer exists to me.

Most Popular Posts of 2017

Surprisingly (or not), they’re mostly Supernatural related. Ironically, I had my most views in a calendar year in 2017 despite posting about my blog topic sporadically. Life. 

Here’s a selection:

1. The Real World: Trump Admin, Week 1. Back when we could laugh about it.

2. How To Straighten Your Nose in 3 Minutes. I highly recommend this.

3. Stupid and Senseless: Dean Cain

My ex-TV husband is currently languishing on BET and SyFy. And the CW. Maybe he should become a liberal.

4. Stupid & Senseless: Part Infinity, Jared Padalecki Treats [insert customer service representative] like shit. 

Another ex-TV husband. I think I have bad taste in fictional husbands.

5. Killer Pet Dog Movie. 

They most show this quite often? The best worst thing that Rob Morrow has ever done.

6. Stupid & Senseless: Jared Treating Someone Else Like Shit


My favourite post of 2017 is probably…

Too Mooch Too Soon & this delightful gem but I might be biased.

You know what, here’s everything I posted in 2017 for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy!

I’ll catch up with you guys later!

stupid and senseless: the tone deaf edition

I don’t bother with stupid and senseless much anymore because anything Supernatural related has been declared persona non grata for some time. I am not interested anymore.

That being said, any opportunity to call out the continued assholery and hypocrisy of the fandom and actors is good with me. The sooner these people disappear from the internet, the better. Continue reading “stupid and senseless: the tone deaf edition”

Send them to Russia

Apparently Supernatural is super popular in Russia and also unites democrats and republicans (because people’s political affiliations have something to do with their shitty taste in television…?). 

So, I think the best solution is to just send the cast and fans to Russia, that way they’re automatically regarded with suspicion and we can ignore them until the New York Times tells us not to. 

Either way, welcome to another craptastic season of Supernatural. 

Please reserve your complaints until May 2018 when it’s been renewed for a fourteenth season and you’re excited but ‘hope’ that the writing is better this time around. 

stupid and senseless: dear assholes, jeffrey dean morgan has a message for you

Another week, and another Supernatural actor doing something douchey. Sorry, I mean ‘deuchey’.

The drama started when JDM posted a picture of himself in a shirt with ‘Blue Lives Matter’ on it.

Blue Lives Matter = a countermovement in response to Black Lives Matter in the United States.

Needless to say, he got a negative reaction. And this is how he responded.

I love that the swear words are edited out lol 

All lives matter

My favourite part is ‘I’m so tired of mean people‘ lol, who was mean to you before this, though? Isn’t he currently getting his ass kissed over his TWD role?

Anyway, after the bad press he ‘apologised’.

Hey folks, I’m gonna delete this thing. God knows it’s out there anyway. I stand behind the sentiment… but, what was meant as one thing has been taken as another.

I understand those that are upset… and to those people I apologize. Of course black lives matter. I stand behind that. Always have. My point.. Calling me a nazi for wearing this shirt, that was given to me by a cops grieving mother at a con? She wasn’t trying to undercut BLM. Nor was I when I put it on… that’s a promise.This country means the world to me. The good people in it mean the world to me… the ones looking for a fight around every corner? Racists? Bullies? They don’t.We are a country divided and its getting scarier everyday. Everyone means something.
Good people are needed. Now more than ever. I shall take better care in wording when posting opinions… but opinions? We all have em, and are entitled to them. I appreciate the ones on here that have been thoughtful responses… the ones that are filled with more hate…. let’s block each other forever shall we?

It’s gotten very tricky to say things that are politically correct that everyone agrees on. We can be offended by thoughts or opinions that we weren’t offended by yesterday. So again, my apologies to you. Ok, let me navigate this mine field a bit before I try again. All my best. Jd

Full story here

Of course black lives matter. I stand behind that. Always have.’

Where’s the evidence? I haven’t seen him talking about black lives matter or racism or the disproportionate number of black people killed by the US police.

That the woman who gave it to him is black has to be the flimsiest defence ever. Like what goes for one black person should go for everyone. Where have I heard that before?

She wasn’t trying to undercut BLM’ – maybe not but the Blue Lives Matter movement was created to undercut Black Lives Matter. A simple Google search will tell him this.

I don’t think people should have called him a Nazi but I don’t have any sympathy for him either. If he’s bold enough to post the pic, he should be bold enough to expect and subsequently deal with the response that came. Has he been living in a cloud for the past couple of years?

His apology was a classic rambling non-apology. I’m sure his fans will say he’s liberal, anti-Trump etc etc. I’m sure he is. He’s just an ignorant asshole as well.

Colour me shocked.

stupid and senseless: curated by Jared and Jensen

Let me just start off by saying that my language is colourful in this post. I could edit it out but I want everyone to see just how ridiculous I found this when I saw it.

So, I accidentally clicked onto my Twitter timeline and I saw this:

I clicked onto her tweet and LAUGHED MY HEAD OFF.


Value: Priceless

I was really tickled pink.

That was before I saw what the unlucky (and stupid) fan will be paying for:

Is this a joke?

Swag, memorabilia and….Personal Polaroid pictures taken from set (why the addition of the word personal? Are they sending dick pics?).

You might as well save your $4k. 

Not even a set visit? Fucking FaceTime? What if you don’t have an iPhone or iPad? That’s a serious question. So I have to find someone and borrow their device because I’ve paid four thousand dollars for a video call that’s usually free. Lol. Fuck outta here.

Although, anyone silly enough to drop four grand on this foolishness would probably buy an iPhone if they don’t have one already.

The sheer brazenness of these people is disgusting.

What’s a fan got to do to get some real face time, though? Donate a kidney (+ transportation and their own medical costs?)

The replies are full of people saying they can’t afford it because they’re:

  • Broke
  • Not rich
  • Paying for cons already

The last point had me rolling my eyes. None of these people have any common sense. They will be crying about con tickets while paying exorbitant prices. It was quite funny but sad at the same time.


How can you complain when you have shown these people that you have bottomless pockets. Some of you will borrow money from people to spend one minute in the presence of these people and listen to them talk about their lives for two hours. Some of you will work multiple jobs to afford this shit. Some of you will complain after attending these things only to go again the next year. 

One strategically tweeted #SPNFamily and everyone is rushing forward with open wallets.

All Jared and Jensen see is dollar signs. So excuse me for not having any sympathy.

What is wrong with you people?

Why are you entertaining this madness? You have been donating money to these people on a monthly basis for years now. Years. They will not stop taking your money until you stop giving them your money. Meanwhile, their money (mostly) isn’t going anywhere but the bank. The bank. Please have some respect for yourselves.

Like my friend put it:

Fools and their money. The guys probably came up with this scheme to pay for half of a teeth bleaching session.

Someone will have to tell me what the final bid was but $4k is probably what Genevieve spends on one ugly blouse per shopping session. Why would you donate money in the name of people who don’t value money in the first place. For all of the money fandom has collectively donated, how much have the guys and the wives donated? Have any of you demanded receipts?

Do any of you have at least one functioning brain cell?

If you do – please use it. I don’t really care, I just hate being exposed to such stupidity. Just seeing it makes my head hurt. If that makes me a hater, feel free to let me know. I will wear my title with pride.

Note to Jared and Jensen: 

Please curate Supernatural’s cancellation charity raffle (at this point you might as well bleed fandom dry). Haven’t we all suffered enough? Let the show die a peaceful death already. Please. 

To conclude: UGH.

#tbt – that time I wanted to FedEx my diary…

I am always finding old diaries of mine and they have one thing in common. Pages and pages and pages and pages and pages of nonsense about Supernatural. Where I found the time, I don’t know. However, in between the facepalming, there’s always some good laughs to be found, such as this passage:

Linkin Park ‘Shadow Of The Day’s is such a rad song! I love it. Hehe. I just had an idea. I could fill up this book and like FedEx it to Jared and Jensen. Ha. It’s very unlikely but it’s an idea, right? AAGH. I’m going insane. I want to watch SPN.

I think watching SPN was part of the problem. Continue reading “#tbt – that time I wanted to FedEx my diary…”

Obligatory ‘why is Supernatural still on?’ post.

Comic Con and Supernatural are two things I actively avoid, but apparently my news app (ironically called ‘SmartNews’) is having a funny turn today.

Just reading this article gave me a headache. Castiel is dead but not dead dead. Mary is gone but not gone gone. Dead Bobby is dead dead but might come back anyway. Sam and Dean won’t agree on something or other. Crowley is definitely gone (LOOOOOOLLLLLLL at the article and the comments).

The show is dead in the water but not truly dead in the water.

Jared Padalecki, knocking it out of the park and showing that he’s the CW’s FINEST! And the answer to the question is: make fun of your hair. 

Somehow they managed to pay Kansas enough money to perform, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

To conclude, nothing has changed and if you value your time, avoid the show. If you’re someone who has time to waste or problems letting go of fictional characters and/or poor judgement, by all means continue. Continue reading “Obligatory ‘why is Supernatural still on?’ post.”

OMFG, We’re Shadows! Part 2

It’s getting far too serious around here, so here’s some humour for you!

I started this before I became more active on WordPress, so to explain, it’s like a mock supernatural themed TV show that isn’t solely based on Supernatural (the show that my blog was originally about).

Part one is here. This series kind of fell by the wayside, but good news! Untitled Unrealistic Teen Drama is on it’s way back. I just need to write it and stuff, but… yeah, watch this space. Or casually observe it from time to time.

Omfg, We’re Shadows 2



Tactless is eating his breakfast while Senseless completes his ‘How To Win Her Back’ paper. Senseles happens to be wearing a labcoat


(sexy frown)

Hey, Dexter, what’s with the lab coat?

Sensitive ignores Tactless and takes a sip of his kale and spinach smoothie.

Tactless grabs a bread roll and throws it at Sensitive


Dude, what are you, twelve?


FYI. My childish antics add to my sexiness levels. Anyway, we can talk about me later. Explain the coat


Sometimes I can’t believe that we’re related.And I’m getting ready to make some more visibility elixir because SOMEBODY keeps using it to get laid


I have it on authority that I’m God’s gift to women. Using that elixir is me doing everybody a great public service


You have no shame. Need I remind you of Jill?


(sexy frown)

There’s no H-O-T in shame. So yeah, you’re right about that.Besides, Jill was a special case. What if she and Jack are the convenient legend that we’re yet to determine?



I’m still looking into those two. Now…are you going to help me make this elixir?


Last time I helped we were neon for a week. There’s a reason why you’re the smart one. And even though I’m secretly envious,I’m going to wait until the most inconvenient moment to bring it up. Right now, I’m gonna head to the gym and work on me guns.

Tactless flexes his biceps and barely manages to duck when Sensitive lobs the bread roll back at him.



Tactless is doing his soon to be patented sexy-wink walk on the treadmill

He’s smiling at a random woman when he catches sight of a familiar head of blonde hair


(sexy, angry eyes)


Jill looks up, her eyes widening when she sees Tactless. She takes off, leaving Tactless to splutter unintelligently


(sexy frown)


He tries to run after her but forgets that he’s on the treadmill. He goes down like a ton of bricks and ends up in a heap on the floor.


I am far too good looking to have these kind of complications in my life.




Sensitive is sitting on a picnic table, talking to his girlfriend Stacey when Tactless walks up them. Stacey is still a humanoid carrot, although they’ve finally figured out how to make her look less orange.


Oh, hey, Gi–Stacey? How’s it going?


Fine. I guess I’ll leave you two to talk. I know that I’m probably not hot enough to be in your presence



Hey, if I was into humanoid carrot chicks, I wouldn’t turn you down.

Stacey flips him the bird and kisses Sensitive goodbye and leaves.


Dude, what have I told you about speaking to my girlfriend?


I have no idea. Besides, she hates me for no reason.


(eye roll)

You’re the reason why she’s a humanoid carrot thing. You can’t just expect her to forgive you because you’re ‘hot’.


Whatever. I have a bigger problem. I just spotted Jill. You know the crazy chick that pushed me down a hill. We have to do something!


Like what? Take on a murdeeous sibling duo by ourselves?


Yes, but only after we go through an extended training montage.


Wait, what?




There’s a long montage of Sensitive and Tactless working out. Tactless flirts incessantly while Sensitive looks uncomfortable. This compelling montage lasts for five unnecessary minutes.


Tactless and Sensitive are sitting in their living room, researching shadow stuff.


(peers at laptop screen)

According to this one hundred percent factual website, there are a group of people called the Shadow Twisters. They trick Shadows into doing their bidding and increase their strength at the same time.



That makes no sense. According to the Shadow Book Of Shadows–


The what now??


Oh, sorry. The Shadow Address Book. Alternatively, we can call it the magic book?


No. No we can’t.


You never support my name choices.


What are you, twelve?


I’m just saying.


You’re too sensitive, buddy.



And you’re too tactless. Anyway, like I was saying, the Shadow Address Book says that only shadows can control shadows. Which would mean that…


Shadow Twisters are shadows!




Jack and Jill are like, dark side shadows! We need to find someone to stop them from hurting innocent people.

Sensitive raises an eyebrow.


We ARE the someone!


I know that I’m supposed to be the dumb one but you need to reboot that sentence.

Sensitive rolls his eyes and gestures towaeds the laptop.


We are the ones who have to stop Jack and Jill, this is our destiny.


But we’re REALLY bad at saving people.


You know what they say, it doesn’t matter if you fail, so long as you try to succeed.

Tactless blinks.


Nobody says that.


Well, they should. I tried really hard on my How To Be A Bad Boy paper and I got a B+. What kind of grade is that?

This time, Tactless rolls his eyes.



A decent one?


I’m the smart one. TV history dictates that I shoukd be getting straight As!


The past five minutes indicate that you were lucky to come away with a B+.


Like you can talk.


I’m just saying!



Tactless is trying to sneak out of the apartment undetected.

Sensitive detects Tactless.

He switches on the porch light and glares at Tactless.


(sexy glare)

Where do you think you’re going?




With the elixir that I spent the entire morning making?




I hate you.


Save it for episode 3, Sens. Shirtless fight, remember?


I still hate you.


Sensitive snatches the bottle of elixir from Tactless and slams the door shut.





Sensitive is eating breakfast and working on his “What Kind Of Flowers Should I Get Her?” paper when Tactless stumbles in. His face is pale and his hair is stuck up in a million directions. He coughs slightly and Senseless wrinkles his nose.


Dude, are you getting sick?



No. I’m just a bit poorly because someone stopped me from getting laid last night.




I told you that getting laid was my superpower, Sens.


You’re an idiot.


I’m not denying that, but even idiots need to get laid at some point.


Look, let’s just deal with Jill and Jack–

Tactless interrupts.


It’s Jack and Jill


Does it matter?


Yes, you heathen, it matters!



Do you even know what heathen means?


Not really

Senseless sighs and leaves the room.


Senseless and Tactless are loading their trunk with weapons that will be ineffective until the last minute.


So what’s the plan?


The plan is that we have no plan.

Tactless frowns and pauses.


So we’re just winging it?


That implies that we don’t have plan.


That’s what you said!


I said that we have no plan, not that we didn’t have a plan.


I’m starting to see why your girlfriend is so unhappy.

Senseless ignores Tactless in favour of slamming the trunk shut.



The interior of the gym is quiet and dark. They creep in quietly and use flashlights to see where they’re going




Just a quick question. What makes us so certain that Jack and Jill will be here? Wouldn’t somewhere less public be a better lair?


Hey, would ya keep it down!


I was quiet!


You were practically yelling


I was WHISPER yelling. There’s a difference, Sens.


Don’t call me that

TACTLESS and SENSITIVE continue to argue and miss the fact that Jack and Jill have crept up behind them.

Jack takes out Tactless with a frying pan successfully. Jill attempts to take out Sensitive with a unicorn slipper and fails.



Really? A fluffy slipper. That’s your weapon?

Jill shrugs and sucker punches Sensitive in the face. He goes down like a lead balloon and she dusts off her hands gleefully.


Someone needs to tell these pitiful shadows that they talk too much.



SENSITIVE and TACTLESS are bound by their wrists and ankles. For convenience, their mouths have not been taped shut.


I blame you for this.



How is ANY of this my fault?


You’re supposed to be the smart one.


That’s true, but hey, even Batman has an off day.



Take that back. Don’t disrespect Batman like that.


You’re aware that Batman isn’t real, right?


La la la la la can’t hear youuuu

Sensitive rolls his eyes and turns away. He sniffs at the air suddenly and his eyes widen.


Can you smell that?


You mean, my cologne, Passionately Dim? It’s meant to last twelve hours.

Sensitive wrinkles his nose in disgust.


Yeah, that’s probably it.

A minute or so of silence passes by before Tactless sniffs at the air.


Okay, yeah, that’s NOT coming from me. Dude, what’s wrong with you?


Look, I slept through my Noxious Smells class, okay? I can’t automatically know everything.


Yes you can! That’s the very definition of being the smart one. Now, let’s just assume that they are trying to poison us, what do we do?


Sensitive stares at Tactless blankly.


Oh, so you want me to get us out of this mess?


It’s not like you do much else. I make the potion. I get us out of trouble. It’s time for you to step up.

TACTLESS is confused.


Look, either you get us out of here, or we die. It’s that simple. You have to think about Gina.

SENSITIVE turns to glare at Tactless.


Sorry, I mean Stacey.


Too bad. I’m on strike.

TACTLESS starts to cough heavily, and Sensitive follows suit seconds later.

They both fall unconscious.