why

pre-snarkview: lie to me


Longer post coming soon, but…

… what was Tim Roth smoking during the last season and a half of Lie To Me

I’m on season 3 and it’s painful viewing. 


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One more thing for Supernatural to ruin


Sigh.

Stars Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki took the stage at The CW’s 2017 Upfronts Presentation on Thursday to announce that the show will do an animated Scooby-Doo crossover in its 13th season. Although some thought it could be a joke, EW has confirmed that the episode is really happening.

When. Will. They. End. This. Stupid. Show.

Scooby-Doo doesn’t deserve this, he really doesn’t. I’ve lost count of the number of things that Supernatural has tainted over the years – its writers’ ability to write, its editors’ ability to edit the show in a non amateur fashion, or its cast’s ability to act, the minds of impressionable fangirls. This show is more destructive than a moth that’s impossible to catch. 

Somebody please make it stop and go away forever. PLEASE. 

(via EW)

Fish Lips and Repetitive Vowel Sounds


Yes, it’s that time where I wonder why you can buy such nonsense on the web. 

I think the makers of this site are just fucking with all of us. 

Seriously

I gaped at this and was ready to move on when I read the description. Specifically this part.

The makers recommend you say vowel sounds out loud over and over again, producing regular and methodical exercises that will strength the twelve facial expression muscles in a comprehensive way

I’m snarkless at this point. Utterly snarkless. The fact that it looks like fish lips. The vowel sounds. The fact that they instruct you to ‘pop in’ the mold and then make mouth movements

Just. 

Bye. 

World Pe(psi)ace


I’m sure that you guys have heard about this mess. Obviously I can’t pass up on this snarkfest!

PepsiCo pulled a commercial featuring model Kendall Jenner on Wednesday after the ad prompted outrage and ridicule from those who said it trivialized rights protests and public unrest in the United States.

The ad, released late on Tuesday, shows the fashion celebrity and reality TV star in a photo shoot when she sees protesters marching. Removing her wig and makeup, Jenner joins the crowd and hands a baseball cap-wearing police officer a can of Pepsi, prompting him to smile while marchers cheer and hug.

I watched it myself (here) and I had so many questions. 

My first was, “that’s a wig, right?”

It’s a good wig!

And then, “what the hell is this Kendall Jenner looking at? This seems like an awkward place to have a modelling shoot. Right by an open door/window/??”

And then, “What? Now this (presumably) Muslim woman is drawing randomly? Why? She’s just here to tick off a box probably sigh.”

And then, “dafuq is this weak sauce protest for? What conversation? Is this a stock footage protest?”

Followed by, “why is there street dancing? I thought this was a protest? Is dance protesting a thing that exists outside of straight to DVD movies?

And then, “Why is this Muslim artist lady so frustrated? Bruh!”

And then, “Oh, so it is a wig? Oh, okay, she’s taking it off? That was pointless. Oh… She’s joining the protest? Baby girl coulda done that with the wig on, but okay. Also, dark lipstick is not the appropriate shade for protests. Got it.”
And then, “Oh, snap, the police are here for this dry protestless protest? Wait… Where’s she going with that can of Pepsi? Oh, hell no! ”

Followed by, “Oh, so Muslim artist lady is happy now that she’s got her camera to capture this beauty. Oh dear.”

Followed by, “what the fuck are they cheering about? WHY IS THE COP SMILING? Is this a street party of a protest?!”

I’d rather live italic

Long story short, Kendall Jenner’s soda brings the police out of the stomp-the-yard.

I think the worst thing about this isn’t even the secondhand embarrassment or the complete cluelessness or the fact that using police brutality to sell anything is fucked up, or the fact that throwing every minority you can think of in the ad is besides the point or the fact that Kendall Jenner taking her wig off is supposed to mean something to any of us. 

It’s the sheer pretentiousness of it all. 

The random cello in random places. The drawing and photography. The way all of the protestors look like the kind of preppy people you see in catalogues. Who in their right mind is EVER going to watch this and think, “I feel like being less of a bigot today. Let me go out and buy Pepsi”? They won’t even think, “Let me go out and take Pepsi.” 

They’ll go out and buy a Diet Coke. 

I can’t understand how they all sat through the concept meetings and no one – no one, I say! – No-one thought, hmm, maybe we should just make a fucking commercial about drinking Pepsi instead of trying to cash in on interpersonal and racial tension! Seriously. Even I could come up with a better idea in two minutes. 

Wrap Kendall Jenner in blue foil and voila. New concept. She could be like the human embodiment of Pepsi. 

Okay, so, that’s a terrible idea but not as bad as the nonsense they put out. I want my two minutes back. Pepsi have wisely pulled the ad but that they released it at all shows how tone-deaf they are. 

A+ casting regarding the guy with the cello, though, he was cute. Playing on the roof for no reason is a mark in the minus column and featuring in the ad at all is a deal breaker but whatever. He’s got bills to pay. I respect that.

Pepsi’s response:

“Pepsi was trying to project a global message of unity, peace and understanding,” the company said in a statement. “Clearly we missed the mark, and we apologize. We did not intend to make light of any serious issue. We are removing the content and halting any further rollout.”

…too little, too late. 

They also apologized to Kendall Jenner for putting her in this position. Sorry, what? Is she going to give them back her check? The fuck does she need an apology for? She needs a Diversity & Culture lecture. Possibly two or three. In fact, they ALL DO! 

AwesomeLuvvie’s gif usage was on point so I’m using it too!


The article excerpts are from Reuters.

Check out Awesome Luvvie’s excellent post on this here.