Smallville: Season 6, Episode 16 “Promise”

Smallville: Season 6, Episode 16 – Promise

Clark has second thoughts about Lana marrying Lex, Lana starts to have the same concerns. Meanwhile… the doctor involved in the secret behind Lana’s pregnancy threatens Lex with his knowledge.

I’m not going to review all episodes of Smallville, just the ones that were shockingly bad. The first time I watched it I was basically in flailing over Tom Welling mode, but I’m back now. The snark is back.

First of all, can I just say that Lana Lang is terrible. It’s not a fresh take but they really went out of their way to make her unlikeable (maybe for good reason? Wait. That’s giving the writers way too much credit).

I actually didn’t mind her in the first two seasons, but from three onwards…sigh. I get the sense we’re supposed to be wowed by their amazing chemistry but every interaction is literally like this:

Lana: You don’t trust me

Clark: *long, meaningful stare* I’m trying to protect you.

Lana: *equally meaningful and long stare* From what?

Clark: *long, meaningful stare and pensive silence*

Lana: *angry glare*

Rinse and repeat until season 6 when she moved on, but also kind of not really.

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Brooklyn Nine-Nine (Season 6)

Well. I figured I’d post something, but it’s not even snark. Sigh. What have I become?


B99/Season 6

Brooklyn Nine-Nine is one of those shows that works better when I watch it all in one go, but I’ve often found that the best way to determine how well a show works is to watch it week by week. Or maybe anticipation is what makes it good or bad? I don’t know, y’all.

Anyway, I watched the entire show during the time season 6 was airing. While I’d seen all of the seasons except half of season 4 and 5 before, it took watching the Backstreet Boys cold open for me to get back into it. That being said it reminds me of my all time favourite show, Happy Endings. I think during the early seasons it had the some of the same writers.

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OS: The Mentalist (season 6)

This post contains spoilers!!

red-john-700x325

 

The Mentalist is one of my favourite shows of all time.

It’s not (and has never been) a perfect show. The mere premise is flawed and the writing has never been amazing. Plots are recycled. The acting is probably just above average. Patrick Jane is pretty much a gimmick; in that love it or hate it kind of way. Despite all of that, the first three seasons of the show are very good. They all follow the same pattern. Procedural episodes mixed with a few episodes central to the main plot of the show – catching a serial killer named Red John who is responsible for the murder of Jane’s wife and child.

The best thing about the first three seasons – to me – is the simplicity of it all. Jane and the CBI team solve murders and occasionally there’s a break through in the Red John case. There are clues placed during the first five seasons regarding Red John’s identity, but the show went from things like, ‘he is ma-” being written in blood on a wall next to a victim to an accomplice revealing that Jane had shaken Red John’s hand. A fact that should have been made irrelevant on the basis that Jane had already come into contact with Red John before.

That little clue led to the compilation of a list of suspects, leading to the basis of the final showdown between Red John and Jane. The list is the point at which I sort of realised that I kind of didn’t like the show all that much. The fifth season was more serialized than previous seasons and it honestly got really tiring to hear more and more Red John clues, because they clearly weren’t going to lead anywhere by that point.

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I never did pick #1 for worst Supernatural episode…

I’m torn between:

  • family remains (4.11)
  • the whole of season 7
  • the unforgiven (6.13)
  • I’mma pick one soon and complete the list. I’ll probably cheat and have more than one in the post.

    THE FIVE WORST EPISODES OF SUPERNATURAL IN 2011 – #2 @paganrjg

    Technically, this is two episodes but I watched them together so they’re paired together forever, k? Good.

    6.21-22: Let It Bleed & The Man Who Knew Too Much

    The last two episodes of a season is generally when the Supernatural writers decide what the plot of the entire season will be. So smart people won’t waste time hashing it out until then. Even smarter people will have their brains weave some sort of perfect explanation as to how every links up even if it doesn’t.

    People like me will just bitch and bitch. Because we‘re awesome can.

    Let’s start with Let It Bleed shall we:

    • Long story short, despite the TEDIOUSLY, EXCRUCIATING MONTAGE we had to endure in 6×14 that signalled the end of Lisa and Ben…they’re back.
    • Lisa has some swanky new boyfriend, and still no actual sign of income. But new boyfriend is a doctor. Yeah. I’m saying nothing. Dean really must have been the one.
    • So the some demons bust in and start demonizing and kill the boyfriend (OH, WELL) and Ben’s all like, “SHIT, LET ME JUST CALL DEAN”. Dean tells him to jump out of the window. Hmm, possible breakage of everybone in my body when the demons could get to me anyway regardless of whether or not I jump or just, letting them take me. Yeah I’d pick the latter too (technically he’s not fast enough or whatever but I like my reasoning better.
    • Crowley picks up the phone as Dean’s talking and says he won’t kill them if Sam (oh, remember him?) and Dean don’t back the fuck off.

    As much as I’m not a Dean girl and thus didn’t care that Lisa was stealing mah man (or whatever), CROWLEY, DUDE. Kill them now anyway and save us all from this monstrosity! No? Damn.

    • Anywho Dean finds out from some angel or other where they are and basically transforms into Liam Neeson. Yes. He gets the knife and and slashes and kills his way in there and it reminds me of Taken. So yeah Dean kills things and nobody really cares but him.
    • Meanwhile, Sam is conveniently knocked out and locked in room. I dare the writers to be more obvious.
    • Lisa gets possessed by a demon and stabs herself and STILL DOESN’T DIE. SHE’S A FEMALE CHARACTER AND IS STILL ALIVE. What the fuck is going on here?
    • But in the end they get the demon out, and remember that Sam actually exists and they got to hospital and then…Dean has Cas REMOVE their memories of him. BOOOOOOOOOORING. NEXT!
    • Somewhere in the midst of this episode Cas and Crowley have the same conversation like three times and I don’t remember or care about what was said. They’re both after purgatory blah blah blah.

    What I thought of it:

    MEHHHHHH.

    Next up was The Man Who Knew Too Much and seriously can there never be two episodes right after one another. These two shitfests gave me a major headache!

    • This episode starts with Sam running from the cops like some madman with ants in his underwear. Everyone is confused. He eventually goes into some closed bar, we’re still confused. The bartender lady says some things and Sam’s all like, “I can’t remember who I am”. CONFUSION. Apparently this was Supernatural does The Bourne Identity. Please, leave Matt Damon out of this!
    • I watched this episode recently for some reason but can’t remember what happens next. More of Sam not remembering. But then he remembers some shit after seeing a book somewhere and it’s something Dean said. It’s all so dull that I just stare at his hair and sigh a little.
    • Eventually at some point he remembers his name (OH, WELL DONE SAM!) and remembers how Castiel drained that Professor of her blood (ZING!) and then knocked him out for count (DOUBLE ZING!)
    • We cut to Sam in the panic room (boooooooooooring) with Dean looking over him (awwww). Lol but then this turns rather idiotic. While Coma!Sam is on the road Dean shines a torch into Real!Sam’s eye and Coma!Sam is all like blinded and shit. At again, at some point Coma!Sam smells whiskey or something. WHAAAAAAT.
    • Anyway the bartender turns out to be some chick Sam shot, this would have been shocking if I actually GAVE A FUCK. But at this point, I don’t.
    • Suddenly there are two Sam’s and, my god. PLOT. GOOD PLOT. But of course it’s crammed into this god awful episode. Soulless Sam talks and talks and talks and talks and eventually talks himself to death. The best part is when he shoots blindly into the air like he’s not trained and like he’s not to be some kickass hunter. Whatever.
    • He disappears into some burst of white light that swarms its way into Sam and omg what. Anyway.
    • Then we meet Hell!Sam, who…looks like someone threw tomatoes all over him and he’s the one who remembers hell, he’s not going to fight…so, what’s the point of this scene then? I WANT ACTION. Sam stabs him and *points and previous bullet point* that happens.
    • Meanwhile Dean and Bobby have split and Dean leaves a note and gun BY SAM’S HEAD. Let’s hope the note doesn’t say “SHOOT” on it. That would be awkward.

    They have managed to get ahold of Cas’ location so they drive there. They arrive. Get out of the car and hear some noise. Turns out to be a swarm of demons.

    You could argue that maybe the car now has protective shit on/in it. You could. But I wont be listening to ya. For some stupid reason Dean’s all “GET IN THE CAR” and they do and the car is promptly overturned by demons.

    Totally didnt see that one coming.

    Eventually (I.e 30 seconds later) they get out of the car alive. Now somehow before this Cas has basically told Crowley to go fuck himself because he’s not letting him have any souls. So Crowley, naturally shacks up with Raphael, who…wants to start the apocalypse again and free Lucifer and…no, no no more explanation necessary – it made little sense.

    When Dean and Bobby enter Cas, Crowley and Raphael are idk talking about god knows what. Dean tries to kill Crowley and is promptly flung across the room.

    Cas is all MWUAHAHAHA I ATE ALL THE SOULS BITCHES and he bursts Raphael (I would care if this bursting thing hadn’t been used in the last season finale). Crowley splits. And Dean days something about attempting to undo the character assassination that’s just been inflicted on Cas but no, Cas is fine.

    There’s a scene at some point of Sam staggering past the mashed up Impala. LOL WHAT. he’s having hell flashbacks so I know he did not drive a car like that. CAN HE FLY? Because I’m pretty sure he did not arrive there 20 minutes after Dean and Bobby did lol. Oh show.

    But they apparently need Sam to be in this scene so he staggers in and stabs Cas. But it has nooo effect. Crap. Then Cas is all like “I’m God now, bow down bitches” and Sam, Dean and Bobby look GOBSMACKED. As if we couldn’t all already see this we’re treated to some delightful zoomed in shots of BOBBY, DEAN, SAM AND DUN DUN DUN CAS’ NOSTRILS!

    Ew. I imagine that everyone was screaming “fuck you!” at their screens after that ending, unless you’re a Cas fan. They probably weeped.

    What a steaming pile of shit this episode was.

    thoughts on season 6.

    Bobby

    -Don’t like how Dean is his favourite – the one character that Sam and Dean has common ground with and that’s gone? The fact that he didn’t tell Dean that Sam was alive because “Dean got out” made no sense to me. His wife was killed by a demon before he became a hunter. He’s been a hunter for long enough to know that you can’t freaking escape it so it made no sense.
    -Also, he got out of his deal too easily.
    -His animosity towards Sam in 6.12 just made me dislike him even more. Yeah – okay Sam tried to kill him but he had no soul, and yeah soulless sam was an extension of Sam but he’s not the same person without a soul. Plus, considering he didn’t remember anything and Dean didn’t want him to Bobby’s behaviour was so off that, you he was always going to twig.
    -Why isn’t he dead yet?


    Castiel

    -Like I said before, worst kind of character assassination I’ve witnessed out of Grade-D horror movies.
    -Mostly turned up to help Sam and Dean when they had a problem yet somehow managed to perform a 180 and go all Anakin skywalker on us.
    -Was mostly absent from the first half of the season (I’ll get to this later)
    -HE CAN SUDDENLY MAKE HIMSELF INVISIBLE. WTF.

    Dean
    -Had no real storyline past getting sam’s soul back
    -Appeared to act as though leaving Lisa/Ben behind was a huge hardship even though all he did when he was with them was freak out about how much danger he was in
    -Acted like Sam was a consolation prize
    -HE PUT THE GUN BY SAM’S HEAD IN THE FINALE.

    Sam
    -I loved Soulless Sam!
    -The stupid wall made me roll my eyes
    -His frequent apologies upon his “return” were too soon imo, how could he truly be sorry if he didn’t know the full scale of what he’d done (depending on what Cas told him – and I suppose Cas may have seen everything now that he can become invisible but would he tell Sam everything?)
    -After one flashback episode, the wall was ignored until the finale -.- way to develop a plot.
    -The finale was stupid and confusing (I’ve only seen it the once, on a web stream but I remember the parts I paid attention to (any scene with Jared in it basically).
    -I liked the different parts of Sam splitting though and how he had to “kill” them all to put himself back together (I guess?) though I have to wonder what the point really was. It was too quick and over far too easily.
    -HOW ON EARTH DOES HE GET TO WHERE DEAN AND BOBBY WERE? BY HOTWIRING A CAR? IF SO HOW DOES HE NOT CRASH? HE COULD BARELY WALK STRAIGHT. OR MAYBE HE WALKED THERE. Possible if Bobby’s house was five minutes away.
    -I don’t how he’d even have a read on the situation through all the hell flashes, so I was mystified by him stabbing Cas.
    -Season 7 is going to be about Sam and hell but imo, it would have worked much better as season 6 sub-plot for the second half of the season.

    The Mother of all (failed storylines)
    – Stupid name
    – Stupid storyline
    – Stupid characterisation
    – Stupid end to a stupid plot
    – Stupid waste of nearly half a season
    – Stupid way of fucking up the purgatory storyline

    Crowley
    – I liked him and I knew he wasn’t dead
    – Only character I can actually tolerate (besides Sam)

    The Campbells
    – The most unnecessary set of characters I’ve ever come across. Grandpa on his own would have been okay, imo and I didn’t buy that whole turning against his grandkids in order to bring Mary back nonsense.
    – Rather than attempting to make this storyline make any sense, the writers killed them all off. The End.

    Ben/Lisa
    I think someone watches too many soap opera’s lol.

    I can’t remember or have blocked out all other characters lol.Feel free to ask me about any others (if you dare…hee)

    Overview
    All in all, they had no clear plot in the first half besides Sam’s soul and what the hell Grandpa was doing alive. Sera was adamant that Sam’s soul plot would only last half a season. Mistake no.1. That’s stupid, especially if they knew they were going to have that wall (which, I’m assuming they didn’t because they were clearly picking ideas out of a hat imo lol).
    Then we had a million sub-plots like mother of all, dean/lisa, angel civil war,what Crowley was up to which is okay as long as each is explored in equal amounts. I find it stupid that we spent so long on the mother of all storyline only for them to realise that it sucked and end it in some stupid way. If she was such a threat how is it that Dean killed her in 3 seconds. And in true Supernatural fashion, we get a new made up plot in the last three episodes, this year it was Cas getting out of hand blah blah blah. Based on three episodes of us seeing Cas struggling with what he was supposed to be doing am I supposed to believe that he’s gone so far that he’s now the Big Bad. Bearing in mind that he had like 10 minutes of air time in the last two episodes. Stupid.

    Notable episodes

    1. 6.14 – probably the worst episode of supernatural I’ve ever seen. The cheesy dean/lisa montage was so awful that I nearly turned it off, lol. Plus that kidney or whatever organ it was crap was a total 180 from all of the angry spirit stuff we’ve seen before.
    2. 6.15 – How anyone can say that this is the best episode of SPN, I do not know. Most awkward 40 minutes of TV that I’ve watched.
    3. 6.05 – Wasn’t funny.
    4. 6.08 – HOW IS THAT PEDO-DOG GOT TO LIVE????
    5. The cas episode – only episode of this season that I actually liked. And I don’t even like Cas.