I am officially no longer a fan of anything*

This is kind of a response to this: Vision. Fans all have different visions etc. Yeah. Anyway. Rant incoming.

nolonger


*Well, except for Manchester United, Chris Hemsworth, certain boybands and Simon Baker. And Tom Hardy on the days when he doesn’t annoy the shit out of me (I am pretty sure most of what he says is just pseudo-babble).

Anyway, for the sake of this post I will mostly refer to football/soccer fans because they’ve really captured my disdain for ‘fans’. At least with SPN, there’s the ‘these people have [insert adjective] fantasies about [insert annoying person affiliated with SPN]’ aspect. It’s stupid but whatever. They’re gullible consumers and whatnot.

Either way, sports fans don’t really have that excuse. Man-crushes don’t count.

Anyway, I used to read the Guardian for sports comments. Basically, I’m the kind of football fan that spends two hours POSTING IN CAPS on Twitter and after that, I go into lurk mode. I stopped reading the Guardian Sports section because it was just full of silly opinion pieces in which the writers would argue against points that they had been writing about for weeks. There was also an aggressive campaign to get a manager fired which was distasteful. In the end, the amount of rage said manager (of my team, no less!) generated was hilarious to me (well, not during matches). They also have this annoying habit of not linking sources. I get it, they have a business to run but it is kind of frustrating to read an article that assumes the readers knows what the fuck they’re talking about it despite providing no information. They do it a lot and I am over it.

So I started using r/soccer, which is basically the subreddit for everything soccer related. I actually started off at the sub for my team but it was very all late teens/early males’ ish and kind of hilariously bad so I switched to r/soccer.

It’s even worse. Continue reading “I am officially no longer a fan of anything*”

This is hilarious.

This guy on reddit has been posting about how he hired a hitman on himself and decided to toy with him [the hitman]. I have no idea if it’s true but it’s all kinds of hilarious:

So I’m in some random starbucks in the middle of downtown Las Vegas typing this out for reasons that are beyond me. I guess that if I die I want at least someone to know what happened to me. You’re probably getting the impression that I am scared for my life, but you would be completely wrong. In fact I’m having the most fun I’ve ever had; this is by far the best game I’ve ever played. Now enough of my babbling, let me indulge you on why I hired a hitman on myself. 


There are five parts (at my last count) – if you click on his name (murdering_time) and go to the submitted tab you can find the links to parts 2-5.