snarkview: 9×14, sam and dean are survivors

Hey, guys.

Episode title: CAPTIVES

What it should have been called: How Not To Captivate An Audience.

You know what I never noticed before? How disgusting the title card is? IT MAKES MY BRAIN ITCH.

HIDEOUS

Previously: I assume that Sam and Dean felt this way about each other (I know that Sam most certainly has this on his iPod).

Now that you’re out of my life,  so much better. You thought that I’d be weak without you. But I’m stronger. You thought that I’d be broke without you. But I’m richer. You thought that I’d be sad without you. I laugh harder. You thought I wouldn’t grow without you. Now I’m wiser. Though that I’d be helpless without you. But I’m smarter. You thought that I’d be stressed without you. But I’m chillin’. You thought I wouldn’t sell without you. Sold 9 million.

They’re survivors, guys. They’re not gon’ give up.

Or well, in this case ‘sell’ would be ‘kill’ and they’re probably way too incompetent to kill 9 million demons, bad guys, inhuman nieces/nephews/ex-girlfriends. Oh well.

snarkview: 8×23, a horrible, horrible way to waste 45 minutes of your life.

The best time to quit a show is either right after a season premiere – “I’ll catch up later”, and then you NEVER DO – or, right before the finale because you can pretend that they didn’t fuck everything up beyond repair. Unfortunately when every episode of Supernatural is a lesson on How To Fuck Up The Show Even More, knowing when to quit is impossible. DO I QUIT TO SAVE MYSELF? OR DO I CONTINUE SO I CAN MOCK THESE PEOPLE AND CALL THEM STUPID JUST TO MAKE MYSELF FEEL BETTER.

We all know what choice I’m going with. I’m still half-quitting though. Ahem.

Anyway, finally watching the finale! Better late than…watching it at all, but I’m dense, you all know that. I’m a danger to myself.

What This Episode Was Called: Sacrifice

What It Should Have Been Called: The One Where The Writers Exceed All Previous Attempts At Ineptitude 

snarkview: 8×14, the one where my eyes are rollin’, rollin’, rollin’.

I’m going to attempt to do this as I watch but alas, it’s inevitable that I’ll give up in about two minutes due to boredom.  I did it! Kinda. It was all in short note form so I HAVE TO EDIT IT AND WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF.  Also, I had to change my layout  AGAIN back to the first ever one (hence the header) because the text is being a bitch. Fix your shit, WordPress.

I think it’ll be less snarky. Boo, oh well, here goes.

What the episode was called: Trial and Error

What it should have been called: Rehashville 50.0

Andrew Dabb wrote this one. Andrew Drabb.

The episode starts off with a recap made up of mostly season 2 clips. Ugh. Stop tainting one the two seasons that I still like, please. And then there’s some shit about how this place (Sam and Dean’s new house or whatever) has every spell, potion etc. I haven’t seen that episode yet but REALLY? Another magical building that has all the information that Sam and Dean could possibly want.

B o r i n g.

There’s a montage of Kevin doing shit, like drinking coffee and probably whining to himself repeatedly. Eventually he falls unconscious. Yay!