castiel is stupid

Amusing search terms #3


I always love looking at the search terms in the stats section on here – mostly because the stuff that people put into Google is kind of funny. Some of these might be repeats from #1 (I can’t find the post!) and #2 because WordPress has screwed around with the stats page. Siiiiigh.

First of all I have to start with this:

mitch pileggi eyebrows

Why? Why would anyone search this? His eyebrows are terrifying. Someone could literally write a horror movie with his eyebrows as the monster and we would all be genuinely scared. No points for you, anonymous searcher!

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stupid and senseless: the misha collins edition


mishaprick

You know what? I’m so fucking tired of Misha Collins. So fucking tired. He can go and fuck himself. Fuck his stupid character. Fuck his stupid Twitter. Fuck his self-indulgent charity. Fuck his rabid fans. Just fuck Misha Collins.

IN ARSE HAIR

When people called him out, he naturally got all defensive, because charity absolves you from realising that certain jokes are in poor taste…

He can literally go and choke on a goat horn.

ETA: This is basically a general reaction to him in general because he’s said and done much more than this tweet and the irritating follow ups.

And the results are in!


snarkawardbanner

 

People actually voted, which is cool. Thanks! I have some results to present in the form of a gold cupcake that I uh, borrowed from Google Images. Please don’t sue me, oh great creator of this cupcake.

*drumroll*

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snarkview: 10×03, a lesson in mediocrity


s-v

 

divider

whatepwascalled

Soul Survivor

[Insert something witty]

Bad

 

JENSEN DIRECTED THIS EPISODE!!!! Do we care? Not really. But this still calls for some

ccake

!!!!!!

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snarkview: 9×23, dean winchester wants you to hear him roar-oh oh oh oh oh oh


finsnark2

 

Finally!!! I will start off with the recap of the season (based on what I remember, which is not a lot). In the premiere, Sam was in a trial-induced coma, and sadly, Dean brokered a deal that unleashed the horror of Jared Padalecki as Gadreel as Ezekiel on us. Dean acted like a dog for an episode. Kevin died and Dean was sad about it. Sam finds out that he’s been possessed by an angel while Dean remains sad. They get into the annual midseason fight. Kevin’s mom gets her revenge and Ghost!Kevin tries and fails to be the voice of reason re: the annual fight. At some point Dean takes on the Mark of Cain so he can seek revenge on…everyone, or something. Dean starts to lose the plot. There as an abysmal spinoff attempt. Dean continues to lose the plot. And then his batshit-o-meter reaches 100% and he declares that he’s a dictator and loses his damn mind.

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snarkview: 9×22, it’s gonna be dean


Why am I still torturing myself with this show? That’s the question I ask myself every time I sit down to do one of these. And then I realise that I won’t get the answer to that question until someone tells me what exactly the writers are smoking, because clearly, the fumes have gotten to me via my screen. Apparently season 10 sounds interesting….just like season 9 did, and season 8 before that, and season 7 before that, and season 6…I think we all know how season 10 will go. It will start off shit, get shittier, improve for one episode, and then begin a rapid descent into farcical territory.

What the episode was called: Stairway to Heaven (How clichéd!)

What it should have been called: Hallway to Bullshit/The Hilarious Case of Jensen Ackles’ Face

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snarkview: 9×10, here we go again….


Road so far: Jared is a robot. Angels killing each other. Ezekiel isn’t Ezekiel! Abaddon wants control of the angels. Kevin Tran is dead. Kevin Tran is dead. KEVIN TRAN IS DEAD.

Now: Dean burns Kevin’s body as some stupid ballad plays in the background. Are they serious with this song? It was just LOUD, with no resonance to the actual scene. There’s then a ridiculous scene where he stares at pictures on Kevin’s phone and then starts flinging stuff off some table. The editor decided that half of it needed to be in slow motion, adding to the hilarity factor. Dean’s man pain has its uses after all, who knew? It powers tantrums and tabletop disruption!

Next, there is some random popstar called Cory with songs called Baby and Babycakes (and Babyzilla, Babynatural, Babythisshowsucks and others that all begin with ‘baby’). Hmm, I wonder who this caricature is supposed to be a version of…hmm. Joe Jonas, maybe? Anyway, Cory is yelling at the stage lady or whatever and at one point he turns to her is and is like, “Bitch, did I stutter?” in response to her response to him over something. I get the feeling that this is supposed to be funny, but really all I want is for Justin Bieber to go and egg the writer’s house for this sad attempt at humour.

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snarkview: 9×09, you don’t bring kevin tran to an angel fight.


Hi! I finally got around to watching this episode so here we go! I haven’t seen an episode since the premiere but I doubt that it’ll take much for me to catch up with the show’s complex and exquisitely well crafted plot. Yup.

So. There’s a recap of all this shit. Angel’s jumping in vessels, Castiel is human. Blah. Blah. Sam is possessed by an angel with robotic, baby blues. That probably explains why he’s more terminator than Angel.

At the start a bunch of people are facing off against each other. FACE OFF! That movie is awesome. Unlike Supernatural. Anyway. It’s a bunch of bikers vs a middle-aged Glee club. Oh and look, the middle-aged Glee club are the ones who won! Look at them, all covered in blood and looking all homely and shit! HA HA HA HA HA. Angel beef over and done. Next.

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