CW-esque teen drama, episode 3


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I think the one good thing to come out of this is that I’m learning how to write scripts. 


UNTITLED UNREALISTIC TEEN DRAMA

103

‘IT’S GETTING HOT IN HERE’
by
supernaturalsnark

1. INT. CLASSROOM DAY

FADE IN:

We are in a classroom. Hot Male Teacher stands at the front with a sexy, stern look on his face.

QUEEN BEE
If he wasn’t like, 25 and all gross and old, I’d totally do him.

RANDOM BITCHY GIRL
(snarl)
Is there anyone that you wouldn’t do?

HOT MALE TEACHER
I’m hot so they’ve put me in charge of teaching you all sex ed.

ENTIRE CLASS
(groans)

HOT MALE TEACHER
(pouts)
Look, don’t ruin my scene okay?

SKYLET
Do we really need this class? Like, really?

HOT MALE TEACHER
Yeah. Considering that the main cast of this show will engage in boyfriend and girlfriend switching on a fortnightly basis, I’d say that you do!

QUEEN BEE
Oh, ignore the wet blanket. She made out with Hot Guy two minutes after meeting him.

SKYLET
Can we just pretend that I didn’t steal your boyfriend and be BFFs?

QUEEN BEE
No.

SKYLET
(huffs)
Fine. Well. Hot Guy dumped me after two hours anyway, so. How long were you with him?

QUEEN BEE
(inaudible)

SKYLET
I’m going to yell WHAT? really loudly just to draw some attention to your potential embarrassment. We can still be BFFs though!

QUEEN BEE
(louder)
We were together for an hour and a half, okay?

SKYLET
(gasps)
My face is saying ‘Awwww’ and one half of my brain is saying ‘HA IN YOUR FACE!!’ while the other just wants to be BFFs with you, QB!

Everyone turns to look at Hot Guy who’s not wearing a shirt for an unexplained reason.

HOT GUY
(smirks)
Is it me or is it hot in here?

HOT MALE TEACHER
This. This is why you guys need this class. And also, the AC is genuinely broken. However, Hot Guy – maybe you should take some pointers from Cool Guy.

RANDOM BITCHY GIRL
(loses patience)
Are you not going to tell everyone about the pregnancy scare that we had last week?

The classroom falls silent.

HOT MALE TEACHER
Uh. Class dismissed.

2. INT. HALLWAY DAY

CUT TO:

Super Rich Guy is handing out flyers in the hallway. Hot Female Teacher is making out with Bad Guy but no one is interested.

SUPER RICH GUY
Party at my house tonight!!!

HOT MALE TEACHER
Again?

SUPER RICH GUY
My parents are out of town, so yeah!!

HOT MALE TEACHER
(sexy frowns)
Your parents have been out of town every week for the last two years.

SUPER RICH GUY
(starts to look uncomfortable)
Look, man. Remember who paid for your little problem to go away?

HOT MALE TEACHER
(coughs)
I have some imaginary papers to grade. See you at the party!

Further down in the hallway, Hot Guy and Bad Guy are having a locker dispute.

HOT GUY
(glare)
Dude, do you mind – you’re scaring off all of the hot chicks.

BAD GUY
(rolls eyes)
Yeah. That’s totally down to me and not the fact that you have hives all over your torso.

HOT GUY
Wait, what?

Hot Guy looks down and screams.

HOT GUY
Cover for me, okay? I need to go and make myself hot again! See you at home.

Skylet appears and catches the last part of the conversation. Bad Guy ignores her and walks off before she can say anything. Hot Guy doesn’t even see her.

SKYLET
(to no one in particular)
Wow, Hot Guy and Bad Guy live together!!

POTENTIAL BFF/TWOANNA
Yeah, they’re step brothers. You should try living with them. Talk about testosterone overload.

SKYLET
(dreamy sigh)
Sounds amazing. Anyway, I’m Skylet and like totally a wet blanket with a sneaky bitchy side.

POTENTIAL BFF/TWOANNA
I know. I’m Twoanna.

SKYLET
(frowns)
Twoanna….? That’s an interesting name.

TWOANNA
Well, my mom wanted to call me Anna and my dad wanted a name that acknowledged that I was the second born, so.

SKYLET
(bounces)
OH MY GOD, WE HAVE ONE THING IN COMMON. STUPID NAMES! WE HAVE TO BE BFFS!!!!

TWOANNA
Sure. Plus, I heard about your ongoing drama with Queen Bee. She deserves to be yanked off her throne.

SKYLET
(bashful)
Oh, that’s just petty stuff. I would never set out to destroy anyone. Well. Not unless they refused to be my BFF.

TWOANNA
You have a weird sense of humor.

INT. APARTMENT NIGHT

FADE IN:

Hot Female Teacher is making out with Bad Guy With A Heart Of Gold. Her curtains are wide open and her neighbors are well aware of her occupation.

BAD GUY
I think we should stop.

HOT FEMALE TEACHER
(sexy frowns)
Why? We have a good time. I take your drugs, sell them on for a tidy profit and add the extra cash to my Cabo fund.

BAD GUY
(eyes bulge)
You’re dealing drugs?!

HOT FEMALE TEACHER
Duh. And you’re my supplier!

BAD GUY
I thought you were HELPING me! You’ve been using me all this time.

HOT FEMALE TEACHER
No offense, but when I called you at 4am and told you that my customer was getting a little tetchy, what did you think I meant?

BAD GUY
(looks uncomfortable)
Look, how you choose to live your life is your choice.

Hot Female Teacher slaps Bad Guy.

HOT FEMALE TEACHER
You [expletive] [expletive]! Get out of my apartment.

DIRECTOR
It’s like I don’t exist to these people.

BAD GUY
With pleasure. But, uh, can we make out angrily first?

EXT. STREET NIGHT

CUT TO:

Bad Guy is walking down the street when a mysterious car pulls up beside him. A mysterious man jumps out and beats Bad Guy up for plot reasons that won’t be examined any further. Bad Guy manages to call Skylet before passing out.

SKYLET
(valley girl giggle x 100)
Bad Guy?! I was hoping that you’d call!

BAD GUY
(inaudible)

SKYLET
Hello?

BAD GUY
(inaudible)

SKYLET
Even though I can’t hear you I know that you’re hurt!! Where are you??

BAD GUY
(inaudible)

SKYLET
Don’t worry, love will guide me!!! TTYL! BYE!

BAD GUY
(groans)

INT. HOSPITAL NIGHT

CUT TO:

Bad Guy lies in a private hospital room. There are a few bruises on his face, but none on his upper body despite the fact that he was mostly targeted in that area. They have magically healed within an hour. Skylet bounds in with two cups of coffee.

SKYLET
(bounces)

You’re awake! I got you a coffee because you keep falling asleep and apparently you’re not supposed to with a concussion!

NURSE
(raises eyebrow)
He can’t have coffee either.

SKYLET
Wow. No coffee? Having a concussion sucks!

NURSE
Oh gosh. I’m gonna go reread my nursing notes and remind myself that intelligent people still exist in this realm.

The nurse runs away screaming.

SKYLET
Whatever. Hey, Bad Guy, won’t your parents be wondering where you are?

BAD GUY
No. The show hasn’t cast them yet.

SKYLET
Oh. They haven’t cast mine either. We have that in common.

Skylet starts to smile at him excitedly.

BAD GUY
Maybe you should go.

SKYLET
But I saved your life! You’re supposed to profess your love for me. And then we’ll aggressively make out even though you’re injured and concussed.

BAD GUY
Actually, I’m just getting out of a relationship. It was messy and. Yeah.

SKYLET
(gasps)
SO YOU WERE CHEATING ON ME!

BAD GUY
(confused)
…we were never together.

SKYLET
But we were ALMOST together!! I can’t believe this.

Skylet bursts into tears and runs out of the room, leaving Bad Guy to wonder why he can’t attract a normal girl.

END

 

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6 comments

    1. Thank you!

      Of course!! What’s a teen drama without a boyband appearance. I was watching an episode of 90210 earlier and Nick Carter was on it. His body language was truly screaming ‘WHY AM I HERE?! $’. I found it hilarious.

      Like

    1. THANK YOU! 😀 I’m having way too much fun writing them, haha. There’s more on the way, including my dramatic season finale. I’m trying to figure out if I should go with an overly dramatic explosion or a murder whodunit. 😛

      Like

        1. Haha, it’s like you’re inside my head. The season finale (my seasons have 6 episodes because I am reasonable, lol) has an attempted murder whodunit. I might just make it murder for extra dramatic purposes. 😛

          Like

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