So the show’s been renewed for an eleventh season, just like we all knew it would be. For the past few seasons my reaction to its baffling renewal each year has been:
But this year, I’ve decided that it’s a good thing!
No, I’m being serious*. As you will see below, I am taking this very seriously and spent hours coming up with the perfect analogy! Hours, I tell you!
My analogy is this: the sewage system is where all the nasty stuff we don’t want to see out on the streets goes. Without it, all those nasty substances would stink the place up and there would be dirty water everywhere etc. So we need the sewers if we want relatively decent smelling air.
If we apply that to Supernatural, it’s basically the same thing. The writers are shit. The acting is shit. The talent has evaporated. Jensen** is part shit, part gravel and mostly in need of a better skincare regime. Jared*** is mostly hair, part shit, part melted, all deuchebag and desperately in need of a good hair stylist. Misha**** is just…the worst (and apparently best actor when it comes to shit). The editing is shit. Directing – shit. Cinematography – poor. Sound – well in their defence all they need to do is tack on a couple of songs per season and pre-made scores but, just by association they’re also shit. Production…well, let’s go with shit.
That is a lot of shit and it might as well all stay in one place.
They can keep on being shit together and keep their shit away from anything else. Supernatural is basically the CW’s sewer, so it might as well run for 45 seasons. Why not?!
I was going to go into what to expect from season 11 but JoJo has pretty much summed it up in eight points:
1. Recycles of already recycled storylines.
2. Deannuts whining about the unfairness of Jensen being forced to stifle his vast talent for another year. He deserves to be a movie star! Marvel wants him to play the lead in a blockbuster! Yes, they do! Jensen signed on for another year of SPN out of the goodness of his heart because he didn’t want to crew to be unemployed! Not because he’s realistic about his career prospects and he wants to ride the gravy train as long as possible. He’s a saint!
3. More boring angel crap that no one cares about.
4. Sam will be wallpaper for most of the episodes.
5. Destielers first getting hopeful that this will finally be the year that Cas and Dean kiss, then having meltdowns when Cas and Dean bang more women, complete with extra accusations of ‘homophobia’ and ‘queerbaiting’.
6. More episodes featuring poorly written guest stars that are obviously backdoor pilots.
7. Jared’s hair will look terrible in a new way.
8. Jensen will either look as wrinkled as Yoda or he’ll go the surgery/botox route and end up with an eerily smooth, unmoving face.
Sounds about right to me!
In terms of recaps…I’m still suffering from the emotional turmoil of the musical episode but may attempt to watch episode 6 over the weekend, lol.